I've just hit my elbow for the 40th time , this morning . It's not even noon ! Anyways , I am so excited about life . I have been in a very tragic "funk" for the past two+ weeks . I don't know if it was a bit of PMS mixed with stress , or what . But I have been picking fights with Johnathon every day , I have been unmotivated and I sort lost hope in everything . I know it's just the way my brain works . I guess I can keep positive because crazy people don't know they're crazy . And I don't repeat myself . A co-worker and I decided that repetition is a definite sign of insanity . But I know when I am being crazy . I know that my brain works a little different than most , I've accepted it . I know that I will have bad nights or days and sometimes they turn in to weeks . I have accepted it . It's just hard . But Johnathon has been magnificent ! He sticks out the hard times like such a trouper . Which , trust me , is not an easy thing to do .
And it's weird because as soon as we were separated I would long for him . I would grow so worried that he was going to leave or cheat . It consumed me . I'd beg for him to stay with me , when he had not even acted otherwise . Then , when we'd be together the smallest things infuriated me and I would go off on him . It makes me sad that he has to deal with that . It makes me sad that these waves of paranoia and mania come over me and turn my whole world in to a Lifetime movie . But , I am working on overcoming this obstacle and Johnathon is such a great person to do it with . He says all the right things and never loses his temper with me . He is patient and he is so kind .
But on a lighter subject , we bought a piano yesterday . From Craigslist . On one hand , it was our first Craigslist buy gone sour . And by that I mean , a case of majour false advertising .
A couple months ago , we purchased a piano . 60 dollars for an antique stultz and bauer piano that was over 100 years old . And it was beautiful . But we were extremely unprepared and had the wrong person help us move it . In the nicest way possible , she was careless . The piano ended up tipping out of the back of her truck on to the road . Yes , I cried .
So , as money started to allow , Johnathon and I began searching for a second attempt . I was extremely hesitant and didn't really want to invest in something that would break my heart again . But , one day (during a yard sale) Johnathon found a piano , a beautiful one , on craigslist .
The ad said , everything works , the ivories could use some work . So , we jumped and bought it !
The man delivered it yesterday , and lets just say . . . NOT everything works . It is so out of tune , unlike anything I've ever heard . The keys are so lose , so it's pretty impossible to play , and none of the ivories are in even decent condition . On the outside , the body is beautiful . But , as a piano , it's junk . I was a bit let down , but it's just a project I suppose .
God has given me this big ol' arts and crafts project to start . Perhaps it'll mean even more to me once I fix it up with Johnathon .
I guess I better go get on with life !
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